Twin Boys now Single boy

Welcome to Share. I am so sorry for the loss of your son Jaden.

I think I may understand a little bit of how you feel. My triplet sons were born at 26 weeks, we lost Boston after two days, and Kai after 15. It was heart wrenching. Our survivor, London, continued to fight and came home after multiple surgeries and 119 days in the NICU.

During that time, I must admit I felt....numb. I so much wanted to (and did) cheer on any little development London made, yet at the same time I was trying to grieve the loss of his brothers. It is hard to be happy and sad at the same time. I also had to readjust my mind, and realize that my dreams and journey in life would be taking on a new "normal". There would never be three little boys standing in front of me, just one.

I encourage you to be kind to yourself. Losing a child is something no parent should have to endure. On top of that, dealing with day-to-day life in the NICU, things can get more stressful. Take things one day at a time. Know it is okay to laugh and cry at the same time. If there is a friend or family member who you can lean on during this time, try to do so. Sometimes just sitting and talking with someone can do wonders.

Hugs,
Shonda

Please know that I am thinking of you and your little ones. I am so very sorry for the loss of Jaden. My heart goes out to you during these difficult times.

SHARE is here for you.
Colleen

I'm so sorry to hear of your son's passing. I too have one of my twins and lost the other after only 15 hours. When Taylor passed, I was scared out of my mind that we'd also lose Ansley and didn't know how to be strong for her when I hurt so badly for Taylor. My husband and I just made a decision that while we were in the NICU, there would be no tears for Taylor and Ansley would never feel our sadness. When we got home, I would let it all flow down my cheeks. We learned ways to include Taylor's memory in things that we do with Ansley and just praying for strength helped get us to this point 5 years later. I hope that this has been of some help to you. Please feel free to let me know any time you'd like to talk more or just talk to someone who knows how it feels.

Tracy

When I lost Mina after 3 days being focused on her brother Moses is what kept me going. I followed my body meaning when I needed to cry I did when I needed to sleep I did. Do what feels best to you.
I am so sorry for your loss and God bless you and your family.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your little Jaden. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to grieve while rooting lil Kaden on. After my daughter passed away keeping a blog on Share has brought me great peace. It is nice to know I have a place that I can let it all out in the comfort of people who care and understand.

Know that you're not alone and we're here to listen whenever you need.
Lauren

I'm sorry to hear about Jaden. I also lost both of my twins De'Shawn died in 07 and Ke'Shawn in 08. So I will be praying that you and your family get through this tough time and may Kaden makes it. You know what helps the babies is that you could play soft music and do the kangroo hold.

Oh hun, I'm so sorry for the loss of Jaden. Losing a child is a heartache like no other.
Please know that many of us here have been where you are and know your pain. I have found so much support here at SHARE. I don't know what I would of done without the many friends that allowed me to lean on them when I needed that support.
We are here for you during this difficult time.
HUGS,
Colleen

I cant even imagine losing one twin but I will tell you that many women have lost both of their babies. I know how it felt when I lost my son at 22 weeks in December, but you must embrace what you can with your son Kaden and pray that god watches over both of your children.

I am sorry for your loss. I had identical twins at 29wks Jan 2006 and lost one when she was 8 days old. It was so hard. Ava, the one that lived was the one that was having problems so it was a shock when they called us and said get here fast Zoe is not going to make it. She got NEC and died within the next 8 hours of us getting there. Only 1% die from this and she did. It was so hard because part of me wanted to lay in bed and grieve but I couldn't. I had to get up the next day and go right back to the hospital for Ava. I had to be strong for her. I think other than losing Zoe, going back to the hospital the next day was the hardest day I have ever had. There was no time to slow down or grieve. I thought of her everyday but only in positive ways, I had to keep going. It has been 3yrs. and just now I think that I really have time to dwell on it. I am here for you, I know what you are going through.

I'm so sorry you lost your little Zoe. I can't imagine having to go right back to the NICU after a loss, I still can't go back there, but I didn't have another baby there either; you are so strong. I'm glad you posted, as some grieve immediately and others, it takes a while to settle in. Dwelling on the situation is horrible, it's so exhausting mentally, I'm so sorry your going through that right now. Thinking of you and you Ava and Zoe.

Kelly

I'm so sorry you lost your little Zoe. I can't imagine having to go right back to the NICU after a loss, I still can't go back there, but I didn't have another baby there either; you are so strong. I'm glad you posted, as some grieve immediately and others, it takes a while to settle in. Dwelling on the situation is horrible, it's so exhausting mentally, I'm so sorry your going through that right now. Thinking of you and your Ava and Zoe.

Kelly

Hello and welcome to Share. I am so sorry for the loss of your little Zoe. Nothing in life prepares you for such devestation. I know that you possess strength beyond anything that I can fathom because you lost your child and you have to face the place where it happened everyday for the sake of Ava. I am so sorry you have to be broken and strong all at the same time. I pray for Ava's continued progress and peace for you underneath all of your grief.

Take good care,
Yolonda

I was pregnant with identical twin boys. I was diagnosed with Twin-to-twin transfussion syndrome at 22 weeks. I had placenta abruption and wasnt a candidate for the laser surgery instead we had amnio reductions. I had 3 of them within 2 weeks and was told that baby A was showing signs of Heart failure. Baby B didnt have a visible bladder due to having little to no amnionic fluid. at 23 weeks baby A measured at 23 weeks and 4 days and baby B measured at 21 weeks. The doctors feered for the life of baby A since he showed signs of heart failure and said that baby B would probably make it since babys tend to develop faster when they are under stress. at 24 1/2 weeks I delivered my twin boys: Carter and Clifford. They were both very sick and they were given a 90% chance of death. Baby Cliff wasnt peeing and within 2 days had blood in his brain his other orgnas began to shut down and 5 days after he was born he died. I couldnt bring myself to call the NICU and ask for just one baby what once was the Romero twins only became a phone call for one of my sons. The phone call to cremation services ended up being the hardest phone call I ever had to make. I still cry everyday and try to make sense of why my son passed away. I'm overjoyed with the life of my survinving son but sad, mad, bitter, angry and grieving the loss of my other son. Everyday it's hard. My other son is still in the NICU fighting for his life everyday. The doctors told us 2 weeks ago that he wasnt going to make it but he's still here and fighting. I just hope and pray that he'll be able to come home in a few months. It's not fair. I understand exactly what your going through but I still don't know what to say. Just know that Jayden lives inside of Kayden.

I am so sorry for your lose. I know everyday is hard for you. It's been 6 months since I lost Jaden, and to this day it is still hard. Some days i have my moments where I feel like I cannot go on, but i know I have to for Kaden. I hope Carter continues to grow strong. You and your family will be in my prayers.

Stay Strong
Imani

I know your pain I had identical twins in feb they were 9 weeks early and 2 days after they were born Brandon died of heart failure. It has been 4 months and I have days were I feel so lost His surviving twin is doing great and Im glad I atleast have him and his big brother but still miss brandon so much

Welcome to Share. I am so sorry for the loss of your little boy Jaden. I am certain that he is looking down cheering Kaden on. I cannot fathom the raw pain of loosing a child, while also still needing to be supportive of another. Please know that there are many parents on Share that have had to unfortunately experience this pain and you will not be alone in this journey. Please keep us updated on how Kaden is doing.

Love, Kelly

I also just gave birth to twins, one survived at 25 weeks gestation. Aaden (1 lb 7 oz, 12" long) was born into heaven. He had a knot in his umbilical cord after fighting so hard to come back from a severe case of Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. He was two weeks behind his brother Evan (1 lb 9 oz, 13.25" long), and ended up being only 2 ounces smaller!!! That is amazing! Evan is currently in the NICU, improving every day! Just yesterday he got his picc line taken out, they dropped his high flow to 4 and he is now eating 20 mls and weighs almost 2 1/2 lbs!!!! It's hard to cheer Evan on when I hurt so bad. But I have to be strong! I look at it like Aaden gave up his life to save Evan! I don't know how else to cope. I've started going to classes at the Hospital to learn what I can do with Evan, and I get a chance to talk about Aaden there. It helps.
Please if you ever need to talk, I am here! We share the same pain! And we are all here for each other!

How is Kaden doing?

Hello. I had twins on 8/25/09 a boy Kenyun 1lb 4 oz and a girl Kenya 1lb 8 oz. I had to have an emergency c-section because Kenyun was not doing well in my tummy. Today Kenyun went to heaven and Kenya is still in the NICU weighting over 3lbs. We are still praying for her. I believe GOD had a purpose for Kenyun and when her purpose was done GOD took him home. I don't know if Kenyuns's short time on earth was for the purpose of someone else or for me and my husband. I know that all I can do is continue to Thank GOD for allowing me to have his son for 31 days, I Thank GOD for seeing him smile and squeeze my finger. Even thou I am hurting I am still giving GOD the glory. I know he will give me understanding and bring me through this. If I don't believe that then I do not have any Faith. I will not allow the devil to still my joy. I love my daughter very much and I can't wait for her to come home. I know that my son is in GOD's hands know looking down at us. I hope you believe that all things all possible with GOD in your life. I'll pray for you and your lose.

WElcome to SHARE. I am glad that your daughter is doing so well but sad for the loss of your son to heaven. Please know that we are here for you if you need someone to "talk" to.

Take care and please keep us posted.
Ellen

Kenya was taken off the ventilator on Oct. 9th, we was able to hold her for the 1st time and hear her cry. We were so excited, that was a wonderful feeling to be able to hold her.

Congratulations on such a huge milestone. Isn't the feeling of holding them so exhilarating?

Good luck.
Ellen