Wanting to try again!!!

I'm so sorry that you had to say goodbye to little Joshua way to soon.

I've been in a similar situation. I lost my first pregnancy due to incompetant cervix and had to say goodbye to my little boy Gabriel way to early too. My water broke in the middle of the night and we didn't know why. After we lost our little boy the Drs didn't think it was IC because we lost him earlier than normally seen with IC. He was born at 16 weeks 4 days.

My husband and I waited about 9 months after saying goodbye to our first little one before we attempted to get pregnant again. We both needed to time to greive our little guy and also to prepare ourselves for the stress of being pregnant again after a loss.

One thing I will say is that I wanted to try again sooner than my husband, but in the end I'm glad we waited a while.

We are pregnant again right now and it has been a journey full of hope and joy but also stress and fear. it was during this second pregnancy that we found out at 19 weeks that my cervix was dialating and I had to have an emergency cerclage. It was a stressful experience but now we know why I lost my first little boy and now this little boy (who we named Griffin) has a chance of making it.

Keep in mind that now they know what the problem is with you they can put in a cerclage and hopefully everything will go much smoother for you next time.

You will never forget your first born, but having another life inside you will give you a second chance and hope in your life again, but you have to wait for the right time... so follow your heart and talk to your boyfriend about it.

I am so sorry for your loss, it is a pain that no parent should ever have to face. I think that trying again is such a personal decision, I would talk to your doctor, to determine the risks. I wish you the best of luck with everything.

Katie

I lost my precious baby boy, Aidan James, on Oct 10th 2009 so I definitely know how you are feeling. It has not even been a month yet but my husband and I are both ready to try again. I was 19 weeks and 3 days so it was very hard for us to have to see our baby knowing that we would not be able to hear him cry or even take him home with us. I understand that you need to let your body heal but I also think that if you are mentally ready then go for it. Good luck to you and I pray that everything goes well.

Laura

Welcome to Share! Im sorry for your loss I know how hard this is for you! I lost my daughter a little over 3 years ago when she was born 15 weeks premature. My husband and I have recently started talking about trying again! Please know you are not alone! We are always here!

Lots Of Love
~Samantha

I am also really sorry for your loss. Like the others who have responded, I know the pain of losing a child. In December of 2007 we lost our daughter, Avery, for a still unknown reason.
Some of my first thoughts were that if there was some medical miracle that could make me pregnant again that instant, I would've done it without batting an eye. My husband seemed to think we should wait.
Then the doctors were telling me that I should wait 1 to 2 years before trying again! I was devastated because that was so long, and I didn't trust them anymore anyway. After the 8 week post partum mark passed, and I had chosen new doctors, I got the physical okay to try again, but I had started having second thoughts. I questioned if I was trying to replace my daughter, or if I could handle something else going wrong.
For me the right decision was to start eating right and exercising and taking the best care of myself that I could. In April of 2007 my husband decided he wanted to try again. So we started trying even though I was leaning towards waiting. I just expected that we'd get pregnant right away because that had already happened to us twice...we have a 4 year old son.
Then nature intervened. We tried for 14 months with no success! I finally called my doctor to see what the problem was. After many blood tests and ultrasounds, she determined that I had some small fibroids, but didn't think that was the cause of our issues. In June 2009, one week before my husband was going to start being tested, I took a home pregnancy test that was positive. I'm currently 23 weeks pregnant and everything seems to be going well so far.
I never would have chosen to wait almost 18 months, but I think that was the best thing for my sanity, my body and my new baby. Having that time to focus on making myself and my family stronger has given me the courage to face this pregnancy after a loss. There is no right answer to your dilemma, unfortunately. From my own personal experience, it kind of just happened when it felt like it!
I wish you the best of luck with your decision. I hope that Share can give you the support you need.

Megan.

Hi:

thanks for opening your heart to us & am so sorry to hear about your sweet angel. Know that youare NOT alone. I also lost my sweet angel Alexander at 25 weeks but he survived for 6 weeks..It was so ahrd to try again as we are scared & uncertain, This happend in 05 & we had a great support team that helped us & adviced us & we tried agian in 06 Dec. *& had Adrian in 07-07 & know our aughter will be 1 in Nov. 20.

I wish you the best of luck & I agree go with your heart & talk to the doctors. Please know we are here. Keep us posted.

Patty