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TRACI'S THOUGHTS

Trixie2310

May 2013

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ITS A BABY

May 21, 2013 08:16pm (EST)

Baby is doing good. Measuring a whole 13mm long.

heartbeat is 179 bpm. The specialist released me to my regular ob today. Called and got an apt in a few weeks. My re said if anything doesn't feel right between now and then to call and they will get me in ASAP. I really like this Dr and am kinda sad to leave, but he believes were on the right track and with the plan we have with my ob he ssys there's nothing more he can do. Bluh by time I see my ob I should be about 12 weeks. Kinda worried since I'm suppose to start blood thinners at 12 weeks and will prolly need to schedule my cerclage at that apt too since I'm suppose to have it done at 15 weeks. Busy busy .

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ALMOST BABY TIME

May 20, 2013 10:51pm (EST)

Ahhh!! Tomorrow is baby day! I finally get to see the baby. Get to hear it's heartbeat. I can barely contain myself, I'm so excited. Now if only I could get to sleep, then tomorrow would be here quicker. I'll update when we know something

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HELLO LITTLE BLOB

May 03, 2013 05:59pm (EST)

Well we officially have ourselves a blob. Woohoo. Dr says everything is exactly what he expected to see. We have another ultrasound scheduled for the 21st where we actually can see the baby. Nurse said if between now and then something doesn't feel right or I just decide I don't want to wait that long to give them a call and they'll schedule one sooner in Indy, plus still keep the one for the 21st here in town. Only reason I'm waiting till the 21st is hubby won't be able to go to Indy during the week and I don't want him to miss the first time we hear/see the heartbeat. I can wait 2 weeks

makes me feel better just knowing and seeing everything is where it should be.

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STILL PREGO

May 02, 2013 12:53pm (EST)

Results back from yesterdays blood work. My levels are over 3000. I have my first ultrasound tomorrow. They said it was still a little early, but the Dr is out of office all next week and I really don't wanna wait till the next week. Plus fridays are best for hubby and I especially when we have to go to Indy. Morning sickness kicked in today so I'm home from work. Morning sickness with the girls was always hit and miss and usually hit if I wasn't eating reguarly. It's still so early but I'm excited. We've told family and close friends and they've all been informed we will not be accepting any gifts for this baby. We have almost everything we could need from the girls, and if its a boy well buy new clothes, but I can't bring myself to pack up another nursery if something goes wrong. I'm not planning for it to go wrong but at the same time, we all know how fast and unexpectedly things can change. I already love and want this baby so much, I can't and don't want to stop that but if I can spare my husband and I a little heart break if this doesn't go to plan than I will. Does that sound horrible? I'm not planning for my baby to not come home, but at the same time we don't know ne other ending. Ahh too far ahead, next step ultrasound

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BLOOD WORK

Apr 25, 2013 08:36pm (EST)

Got my blood work back. Monday was 49 and yesterday it was 102. They said that's exactly what they want to see. I got back Wednesday to have my blood drawn again. They said they're not looking for a specific number just wanna see my numbers increasing. So were heading in the right direction. Still doesn't completely feel real, but hey I'm getting there

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WOW

Apr 23, 2013 08:52am (EST)

So I have to share this with you guys before I burst. We had planned to wait, but I can't. I got my positive!! Hubby has made me take 4 tests over the last 3 days and all are positive. Dr ordered blood and I should have those results today. It just doesn't seem real yet. Been waiting so long for it, I keep waiting for someone to tell me its a joke. Maybe when the Dr calls to confirm it'll hit. I'm excited even if its not real yet

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M4B

Apr 14, 2013 05:51pm (EST)

Well went back to the Re for my ultrasound and again we have 1 mature egg on the left side. Took my shot last week and everything and now we're back in the waiting game. I actually am not getting my hopes up for this cycle. I was hoping for an egg on the right side. I know we agreed to ignore the results of my last hsg as the Re agrees with us that is very unlikely that I really have a blocked tube. The Re thinks if anything there was either a spasm in the tube or the radiologist didn't use enough pressure or something along those lines. We agreed to try this course of treatments for a few months and if still nothing he would re do the test himself. I'm all good with this cause I find it odd that all of a sudden there is a blockage but at the same time I'd have been a lot more hopeful if the mature egg was on the right side cause we absolutely know that side works.
Our march for babies walk is in 13 days. Haven't had a hole lot of donations. I know I have a few family members doing some things in the next week or so to raise money and I did still sell 60 shirts this year but like I thought people are dwindling in their support. Don't get me wrong I know they still care and are proud of what we are trying to do but much like after we lost Skylar they seem to be losing interest. That sounds horrid, but the walk we did right after we lost Skylar everyone wanted to be a part of. everyone wanted to help out and donate. The following year I could barely get people to donate or walk. This year people ordered shirts but I haven't had 1 person sign up for my team yet. I know plenty of ppl that are planning to walk with us but no one has registered and no donations have been collected. I've had a few besides the shirt sells. It makes me question what I'm doing. I know I have been less persistent this year and it makes me feel like I'm letting the girls down cause this is all done in their honor. Sometimes I wonder if we should just take a break then re group, but at the same time it's not like there isn't already a year break between the walks. I don't know I just don't know how to motivate anyone right now. I have these ideas but no idea how to go about. I know I can't do it alone, but doesn't seem like anyone has time to help right now. bluh I don't know. Guess I'll just have to start annoying ppl on facebook till someone listens

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ROUND 2

Mar 29, 2013 07:59pm (EST)

Well I was suppose to test Wednesday so of course af showed on Monday. Really bummed. This why playing with the dates in the 2 week wait is not a good idea. Started my next cycle of pills yesterday and have an ultrasound on the 6th. I know the chances of things working out the first round weren't good, but I still hoped. I guess I just don't understand how it didn't happen. We made sure I had at least one good follicle and then triggered ovulation ... So I don't understand how we missed it.

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SOOO MUCH

Mar 12, 2013 09:13pm (EST)

Well at lot has happened since I last posted. We had our apt with the RE on the 1st. Everything went pretty well. I liked this guy and he seemed really optimistic that he can help us. As you know not at all what I was preparing myself for. One thing I did have issues with, he garunteed me a baby. I know he was probably trying to give me hope or what not but he acttually told us we would have a baby to keep. Sorry buddy but that's a little outta ur hands. Even if I do get pregnant nothing garuntees we get to keep the baby.
He took me off the Clomid and put me on letrozol with a trigger shot. Since my cycles are ne thing but regualr they did an ultrasound in office that day and had me start the new treatment plan immediately. So I went in on the 11th for my follow up ultrasound to see if I had ne mature follicles and I did so we did the trigger shot yesterday. I hope this works as the trigger shot is not covered by my insurance and is $130 a pop. ouch but whatever I can deal. I already looked at the dates if I were to concieve this round and am kicking myself for allowing myself to get so far ahead. One day at a time or I may go crazy.
This past week also brough around Skylar's 3rd birthday. I have no idea how it's been 3 years already. This birthday was different tho. I always just buy or make a single cupcake for her cause it doesn't really feel like a celebration to me. Not one I;ve ever been able to join into at least. This year I bought a bunch of mini cupcakes and HUbby and I had cupcakes with them. This year I could actually see the good, I could talk to the girls and not just stand there bawling. I'll never be over the fact that they are not here with me, but I can now be thankful for the time I did have. I can relive the memories we did share and smile.

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DONE WAITING

Feb 24, 2013 02:41pm (EST)

Well I didn't have to wait the two weeks to test, I started a week early. I'm still doing good though. I allowed myself one night to wallow and decided now was the time to do something. I got a referral from my Dr and set an apt with a specialist. I go Friday for a consult. If we like this guy he even has an office in town so I wouldn't have to travel an hour and a half for labs and such. I tried to get my apt in town but the Dr is only there once a month so is have to wait till the end of march. So were going to indy. I also decided were taking this cycle off. I've been on clomid since July and we both need a break. At least I'm starting on my own, this makes the 3rd month in a row, so we don't have to worry about that part. I'm just hoping he can help us quickly. I'm running out of paitence and am ready to be pregnant. Also hope if we finally concieve hell let me continue to see my ob, I don't really wanna have to travel to give birth and the hospital in town he has privileges at is the one hospital I detest. I want let them deliver my child again. The nurses there declared they could se skylars head and she was born feet first. Don't want a nurse that can't tell the difference between the babys head and feet touching my again. O but I'm getting too far ahead of myself again. First step get pregnant.

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