March of Dimes

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BRAVE HEART

benaifer

June 2013

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MY PRECIOUS IS HOME!!!

Jan 20, 2008 05:54am (EST)

Truly ever so selfish of me to have neglected SHARE . I must admit though I have been more of a reader here at SHARE than posting my blogs regularly. I just didn't have the words many a times and sometimes I felt so overwhelmed reading all your stories that by the time I was ready to add to my blog I would be weeping buckets.

IYANA my BRAVEHEART was discharged from the hospital after 107 days in the hospital . As I type this blog with one hand she sleeps in my arms innocently though not soundly ( @###$% reflux) .

I am just so blessed to have her - we've been over the moon since shes come home ......I've reached cloud zillion ( coz cloud nine is way too low for my level of happiness) .I know for sure we wouldn't have made it without prayer . HE above has blessed us with this angel who has fought for her life with so many obstacles - all of 750 gms my little braveheart soldier!

I 'm a busy bee at home - hovering aroud her highness ( my husband says our daughter will never be a princess coz she was born a QUEEN .)

She needs to feed every 3 hours - she weighs 3.53 kgs. Her reflux is her biggest battle and even though we keep her upright and burp her well - it still @#^$#@@@ never stops.

Are there any home remedies out there for reflux ? I have stopped dairy ( still expressing breast milk - the dairy farm is open and running in business yet after 5 months) .

Just wanted to thank you guys again for being there for me - will keep you posted on IYANA'S progress ,my smalll wonder!

For the first time I'm attatching her photo - shes a real model everytime we bring the camera out she strikes a new pose!!!

Love ya' all .........untill next time .........MWAH!

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (2) | Permalink

S.F.D. ( SUDDENLY FEELING DOWN)

Oct 27, 2007 03:48am (EST)

I'm inventing a new syndrome for us NICU mothers - its called Suddenly Feeling Down - S.D.S. We dont really need to have any real reason to shed a tear , we dont really have to be smiley all the time and we don't all have to be brave heroes - so once in a while when we feel down and less encouraging - ITS FINE . I'm acutally trying to tell myself all of the above . Anyways I'm sure most of you will agree with me with my new theory and syndrome .

On the positive front Iyana is doing fine. She has stage 1 ROP and just praying that it goes away before I take her home ........zzzzzzz....dreaming of that everyday and all the time . She is 2 months old .

Anyways before I go on ranting about how aweful I feel today - I'll sign off and think of when I can get to " Happy Smiley Syndrome" ..............

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (6) | Permalink

IYANA THE SUPER HERO !

Oct 19, 2007 01:23am (EST)

Just to give you all an update on Iyana's progress. My baby girl is such a hero - at times when I'm feeling down looking at her playing all by herself - flaying her arms up and down - I can't help but feel totally miserable. At times like these she puts her hands up and smiles almost as if saying ' Mom I'm doing just fine ' .

She has now started a bottle feed just once a day .....she gets immensely tired sucking and swallowing and breathing all at the same time .....I stand by her incubator and cheer her on as she finishes her last drop of breast milk .

I must admit I do get a bit impatient at times and want to steal her and bring her home and hold her all night till my arms fall off! The nasal cannula is pretty much around and though its a blessing compared to the c- pap - i still hate it .......everytime Iyana tugs on it and shows discomfort its like a spear through my heart .

Well I'm just rolling with the punches - i'm ever so thankful to God for giving her to us and I will try harder this week to be stronger and emulate my baby's strength and resilience.

Power to Preemies !!!!

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (5) | Permalink

MY MS MUFFET!!

Oct 09, 2007 03:11am (EST)

A few days back the NICU nurses started making Iyana wear dresses. They had bundled her in this white cotton kimono style dress.....absolutely adorable. Though she wobbled in it - it must have been an XXXXXXXXXXXL size for her .....it looked just so cute . We had only seen her all this while in her diaper ' au natural ' so this was a lovely surprise.

Iyana looked like lil' Ms. muffet - all so pretty even though the shirt had no fancy frills . Every mother finds her daughter ever so beautiful - its true ....... Anyways I was so excited that I have been taking her these tiny t - shirts which fit her like a dress and everytime she smiles - she looks like shes posing for a fashion show!

I'm just a bit worried with her second upcoming eye test on thursday . Also selfishly I am a bit let down with my friends. Needless to say they would have thrown me a shower this month - but with Iyana's early arrival they seem to think otherwise. I'm always always the one throwing surprise parties for all and sundry and for once I thought I would definately get one myself. Though I must admit my friends have been soooper supportive and over caring all this while.

Nevertheless I now have Iyana so these small things seem frivolous and empty........just wanted to get it out .......

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (5) | Permalink

I WILL SURVIVE!!!

Oct 06, 2007 03:58am (EST)

Iyana is now at 35 weeks gestation. When we held her the day before yesterday she had her eyes wide open and looked at us and everything around her ever so curiously. I sang to her all the songs that I had been singing to her during my pregnancy. She seemed to have enjoyed my performance though not half as much as her daddy's.
When my husband held her , he immediately started singing his favourite song" I will survive" and boy did she love it. She was all smiles - grinning from ear to ear . It was almost like she had connected with that song . Of course we as parents get so excited with their every lil' move -- we love to interprete their every action. This sure will be another moment we will cherish . The joy she brings to us!!!!!

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (5) | Permalink

WE FINALLY HELD IYANA !!!

Sep 29, 2007 03:19am (EST)

Yesterday was pretty much a milestone for us . Iyana has reached 1 kg - yipppppy ....huuuuurrrrraaah!!!!

One of the NICU nurses knew how anxious we were to hold her in our arms . Iyana seemed calm and at peace and so the nurse was confident she wouldnt get very stressed coming out of the incubator. Before I knew it , Iyana was all wrapped up in a pink blanket and also a pink and white towel to keep her warm . She looked like a candied doll .

My heart was beating ever so fast - I was on cloud nine ( if theres a cloud million then I was there on it too). Iyana with her c- pap in her nose and the feeding tube in her mouth was all snug in my arms. I wanted to cry but didnt want to spoil the moment plus I wanted to show my girl that her mummy was brave though not half as much as she is !

It was really very very very special to hold her - its special for all mothers to hold their babies but somehow my experience felt 'specialer'.

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (7) | Permalink

BRAVE HEART - IYANA!

Sep 22, 2007 04:48am (EST)

We've named our daughter IYANA - ( EE YA - NAH ) . It means God The Protector . We live in Hong Kong so things are different here than the U.S. The hospital is about a 2 hour journey by train each way and we can only visit our precious one from 4 pm. to 8 pm. during visiting hours. Plus the NICU has a rule for only parenst to vsist the baby . Iyana is teh first grand child in our family andmy parenst eagerly await to see her.

Iyana is now past 33 weeks and she's still less than a kilo . We havent held her as yet and I sure wait patiently to hold her .

I have been trying to think positive and keep my chin up though every so often I break down . Nevertheless my husband and I stay brave together . Its really hard at times to see her flapping her hands and legs everywhere and when we touch her she gets more restless .

I'm ever so glad I have found this web page to read all your stories and get some answers.

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (10) | Permalink

BRAVE HEART

Sep 05, 2007 04:26am (EST)

Hi,
I have just delivered a sweet angel baby girl at 29 weeks gestation on 26th august. After reading a few of the stories posted on this website I was relieved to find that there are others who are sailing in the same boat as us . Its been a nightmare and we can only hope that we can soon bring our lil' sweetheart home.

My concern was regarding photographs of our new born. She has all these wires and tubes all over her lil' body . Its breaks our heart to take her picture. Just wondering if any of you have taken pictures of your babies !!

I look forward to being a companion and lending my shoulder for other mothers to cry on - juts as i am hoping to find a shoulder to lean on myself.

benaifer

Posted by benaifer | Comments: (11) | Permalink

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