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WELCOME, GUEST |
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(3 members)
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liyahs0236 |
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6 |
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red366 |
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THE DAMRON DOLLS
kelly d |
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NO GUARANTEES WITH FULL-TERM BABIES EITHER
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Mar 24, 2008 07:12pm (EST)
Today I had a late lunch with a women seeking advice about a project she wants to pursue, a book. Her book is to be about how to live with the loss of a child.
She told me the story about her first born child, a baby born full-term and at a healthy weight. However, he had a cleft palette and heart problems. She told me how she blamed herself for the challenges her baby faced. She wondered what she did wrong during her pregnancy. Nothing. She wondered what she could have done to prevent his ailments. Again nothing.
She has some benefits I didn't as I processed the premature birth of my twin daughters, born at 30 weeks gestation, she didn't undergo infertility treatments that resulted in a twin pregnancy. However, I didn't choose for my husband to be infertile and we didn't choose to struggle in our efforts to become parents, first with infertility then with the premature birth of our girls.
Although, there is one lesson we should all acknowledge: many of us did/do nothing wrong. Many women carry their twin babies to full-term. Why was I to think I couldn't be one of those women? I did everything right in my pregnancy.
I'd love to know if there are other women who experienced prematurity after their fertility treatments. How do you process the experience of your infertility vs. the premature birth of your baby/babies?
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Posted by kelly d | Comments: (3) | Permalink
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