Baskets for NICU Parents

Melissa;

I would like to start be saying what a wonderful person you are to do this...That is so caring and so thoughtful... and a wonderful idea.

You are a true sweetie.....

I agree with Jackie about the services/support information our hospital did not give such information, and it was so needed and would have been something that could have lessen the burden at the time Jacob arrived

Also I agree absolutely Food Certificates to nearby restaurants or coffee shops, Journal, Lots of MOD info, books about preemies, and the web address to share. Disposable Camera, wow the list could go on and on thinking back...

I am sure you will do great.... WHAT A WONDERFUL THOUGHTFUL IDEA !!!!!!!! Good Job Melissa.....



Hugs & Kisses to the babies
Melody
Proud Nana to Jacob Aaron "My Hero"

What about The list of the thing we all came up with that we can't/couldn't live with out? I love all the other suggestions to! Maybe you could talk to the gerber company and see it they would donate some packs of there premie oneis. You could brake them up and put one in each basket. I also think a marker to write on the clothing or other gifts that they recive that they would like to leave.

Melissa,

Well, everyone has given you all of the great ideas already!! You are an awesome person, so thoughtful. Good luck with the baskets! Honestly, I think the most important thing to give them is giving them anything, letting them know that they are not alone in this, and there are others out there to support them, to be leaned on, to pray for them and their children. I know my journal, my camera, and my free parking stickers were in my daily NICU survival bag. Oh, maybe some hand lotion (an anti-bacterial, non-perfume kind) to put on after leaving the NICU...all that scrubbing is rough on the hands, and you don't want to put rough hands on your preemie!

Donna

Hi Melissa.... here is what our had:

A phone card for 120 min.

a $5 gas card (all that travel is expensive)

2 toothbrushes and a tiny tube of t-paste, sample deodorant

a sample of lanolin (for ouchy breast pump use)

hospital map

I think the best gift would have been a disposable camera. I didn't "pack" to go to the hospital, I had no idea when I left home I wouldn't be back for 3 months.

Another idea would be a complilation of places that will host their babies' photos for FREE. Family will want to see their miracles and noone wants extra people in the NICU. Gift cards are awesome because money is always tight when you are paying a morgage and traveling expenses for months on end. Ronald McDon (although a deal) was $20 a night; do that times 3 months and it is $1800! Add gas, meals, medical bills, and WOW!

This is a great idea. You never cease to amaze me... you have your hands full and are still thinking of other's needs. *hugs* I feel proud to call you my friend.

Thank you everyone for your wonderful suggetions! You have paved my way to baskets filled with helpful and hopeful items for the receiving parents. You guys are all the best!

Melissa Middleton

Melissa -

I'm wondering how many NICU baskets you made and if you plan on giving the NICU a new supply of these baskets every so often. What did you end up putting in your baskets?

Also - are you a MOD ambassador? I just filled out a form to be a MOD ambassador and wonder if this is the type of thing that ambassador families do. I love it!!

Lori

Lori,

Because I am not an organization, it is difficult to fund this project without financial backing from big businesses. Because of this, I rely on the generosity of others. I have funded as much as I can .... but this does not make nearly enough baskets.

People asked me what our kids needed for their birthday. I suggested giving a small donation to one of three charities we support. 1 is the MOD BEANIE BABIES, 2 is NICU Welcome and Grief Baskets 3 is to a charity that needs $'s to fund research for sick kids, that is not the MOD.

The response was overwhelming! We sold 18 Beanies, was able to give a nice donation to the other charity, and our baskets have been nicely funded too.

I placed a note in each basket that read: Welcome or Please Accept Our Heartfelt Sympathy For Your Loss (depending on the basket) Please accept this gift basket (in honor of or in memory of) your precious preemie child. This gift was made possible by the contributions from an extended list of people, and all information on prematurity has been furnished by the March of Dimes. Together, we can make a difference.

And then I listed a brief description and address of SHARE.

Inside the baskets is a card...that expresses the appropriate sentiment

Also in the welcome baskets:
1 unscented hand lotion
1 hand sanitizer
1 small pack of Kleenex
1 bar of travel soap
1 small pack of handy wipes
1 small toothpaste
2 small toothbrushes
1 disposable camera
1 baggy with 75 cents for the coke machine
2 lollypops

In the grief baskets:
1 unscented hand lotion
2 small packs of Kleenex
1 bar of travel soap
1 small toothpaste
2 small toothbrushes
1 disposable camera
1 baggy with 75 cents for the coke machine
1 packet of sunflower seeds (my favorite)
hints about how to go about making arrangements when a baby has died

Each basket contains a scrapbook envelope with room for baby's name, weight, length, (baptism date) feet/hand prints....parents name...name of favorite or 1st nurse who cared for child...

I am posting this same note under your response concerning other orgs. supporting this project...

Hugs,

Melissa Middleton (mom of 25 wkr' quads. Alex *deceased*, Benjamin, Callie, and Donovan: 2 years old)

As the March of Dimes Division Director in her home town, I've had to privilege and honor to work with Melissa over the last few months, and I am overjoyed and overwhelmed at what a special lady she is.

She really is this nice! And we're all blessed to know her. She inspires me to do a better job!

Thanks Melissa

Linda

Melissa you are defintitely something.

At our hospital in Georgia, Northside. We have a group called Parents Partnered For Preemies. We are now funded by the wonderful and generous Northside Hospital Auxiliary. They provide enough funds for us to deliver care bags to all babies under 37 weeks that spend time in the NICU. These bags consist of a really nice bag with our logo, a camera, a couple of drinks and snacks, magazines from Atlanta Baby, receiving blankets, beanie babies, Journals and pens, magnets and letters from our group letting the people know that they are not alone. I am so proud of our group and feel that we are making a difference.

Take care!

This is such a great idea.... new nicu parents need all of the support they can get.
One thought for future baskets... there are two poems that I have copies of somewhere in the mess that is my classroom One is called "Heaven's very special child" It starts something like "a meeting was called far from earth, it was time again for another birth...". I can't remember the name of the other one but it's about a family who is planning a trip to France but ends up in Holland instead. At first the family is devestated because they wanted to go to France so much, but eventually they realize that Holland is not such a bad place - it's a metaphore (sp?) for how it feels to have a special needs child.

I always give them out to parents on Open School Night. If you're interested, I could find them and get them to you. Like I said, I don't know where anything in my classroom is because I had to leave it so abruptly in November
Donna - mom to Alexander - 28 weeker born November 19, 2004

Linda -

Thank you for being such a sweetheart and working so hard on behalf of the smallest voices! I am humbled you think so much of me...my kids are my greatest inspiration, and they have lead me to the greenest pastures and the brightest possiblities...more than I could have ever dreamed before having them.

Donna-

I would LOVE copies of your poems. I have seen both of them before, and they brought me comfort. Since they have brought so many parents of your students comfort...and yourself...I can only see good things from passing these little nuggets of wisdom on...Thank you for the great suggestion!

Melissa Middleton

Hey Melissa,
these are the poems...now that I read them again, the language in then "heaven's very special child" one sounds a little dated.. the Holland one is better...
Donna

"Welcome to Holland"

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this:
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

- Emily Pearl Kingsley

HEAVEN'S VERY SPECIAL CHILD
A meeting was held quite far from Earth!
It's time again for another birth.
Said the Angels to the LORD above,
This Special Child will need much love.
His progress may be very slow,
Accomplishments he may not show.
And he'll require extra care
From the folks he meets down there.
He may not run or laugh or play,
His thoughts may seem quite far away,
In many ways he won't adapt,
And he'll be known as handicapped.
So let's be careful where he's sent,
We want his life to be content.
Please LORD, find the parents who
Will do a special job for you.
They will not realize right away
The leading role they're asked to play,
But with this child sent from above
Comes stronger faith and richer love.
And soon they'll know the privilege given
In caring for their gift from Heaven.
Their precious charge, so meek and mild,
Is HEAVEN'S VERY SPECIAL CHILD.
by Edna Massionilla
December 1981

These were really beautiful.

Shannon

Thank you Donna! I see what you mean about wording...but...it still brought you and me comfort....so I'll bet parents will not look to hard at the words as much as the meaning of the words as they hook together! The Holland poem is very beautiful, and I am sure that the gift of words that you have extended to the NICU baskets will be very much appreciated by parents who are heartbroken and terrified....Thank YOU!

Melissa Middleton

Okay guys,

Put your creative minds to work for the common good of preemie parents!

I am creating scrapbook envelopes with small pockets on the outside. These pocket holders will have a space for first picture, foot prints, hand prints, and crib card.

Any ideas on how to cheaply and fairly easily do this....as I have a bunch to make...also, I would like for it to be as cute as it possibly can be...so I know you are the crowd to come to for cute, right?

Thanks!

Melissa Middleton

Melissa,

I am trying to imagine what you mean... but I can't picture it. Must be because I only had 2 shots of espresso in my coffee today. LOL. Can you explain again to my ill-wired brain?

Sure Darcy,

Okay, the envelopes are generic white (like at office depot) so large enough to mail something in (though I am not mailing anything) on the outside there are 3 small pasted envelopes and a square saying (post picture here). So there is available space for the footprints...fingerprints...first picture...etc.

So, the problem is - I want to dress these envelopes up...like you would for a scrapbook...I would love ideas on how to do this cheaply but look really nice....and my scrapbook share buddies (like you) I know can help me think of a clever idea for this....

Hopefully I making sense...I had my shot of espresso so I don't have an excuse!

Melissa Middleton

Melissa,

Ok, I think I have a better understanding now. (Blame the coffee, not the upcoming *30*!)

I think the most cost-effective way would be to invest in a set of baby themed stamps. Stickers are consumable and stamps can be used over and over and an ink pad goes a long way. Do they have an "Archivers" in TX? They have sooo many little hands and feet... rocking horses, baby blocks, etc. Also a company called Stampin' Up has online samples of all their stamps, but you'll need to find a consultant (like Creative Memories or Avon) in order to purchase. Perhaps we have a SHARE member who is a Stampin' Up consultant who could donate the stamps and write it off??? (Girls????)

That's probably what I would do. As far as knowing *how* to stamp. I have no idea. But I bet someone will!!

Best of luck to you, you have a heart of gold.
Darcy

Darcy,

That is a great idea, and one that I completely failed to think about...! Thank You! I'll look into that as soon as possible!

Melissa

Melissa,

Jumping on Darcy's stamp idea....they have rolling stamps too that would make a cute border. I've seem them at Michael's and other scrapbook stores. You can download borders too off some scrapping websites (www.scrapjazz.com or www.creativekeepsakes.com) but then you would have to print them for each envelope and adhere them. I'll keep thinking and I'll check out my scrap mags too. What a great idea!

Donna

Hi Melissa,
I just wanted to let you know that you've inspired me to do something similar in our NICU. There was no support group or anything when I had my son - my husband and I were just in this limbo type hell. The NICU couldn't even find a pamphet on premature birth to give to me for 2 days! Anyway, I was just doing some research on buying wholesale and I found this website
www.nextlevelsavings.com - I haven't ordered anything yet, but they have all kinds of trial size stuff that you can buy in bulk....
 
Take care,
Donna

Donna!

Thank you so much for the GREAT tip! I just checked out the site...and I think that this new devleopment has great potential to help us help a greater number of people. (I am on the internet every day..and did not even think of looking up deals online!)

Thank YOU!

Melissa

Dear SHARE Friends,

Many of you gave great feedback about what should be put into the "Welcome" NICU baskets! Thank you so much. I love to give credit where credit is due...and SHARE was thanked on the list of those who helped make the baskets possible!

Also, the MOD's gave me LOTS of GREAT information to put into the baskets...and donated some wonderful journals! So of course, the MOD's is greatly appreciated too.

Because I am so grateful, I also added the SHARE and MOD websites to the greeting cards attached to the baskets.

Please know that you made a difference today to lots of families! Your input and support is invaluable!

Hugs,

Hey Melissa,
I just got my Oriental Trader catalog today (a teacher's best friend!!!!) They have some cool stuff at good prices, they even had Angel pins... if you're interested, it's
www.orientaltrading.com
Donna

Donna,

Thank you so much for sharing yet another wonderful resource! And trust me, I am using each one you pass along!

Melissa

Melissa,

I started reading all about your baskets and all he ideas you were getting. I would like to do this for my hospital here in Minnesota. My son was also born at 25 weeks and is doing ok. I would like to know if I have your premission to use your ideas. I also would like to know how you got this funded. Please email me at patrick.murphy@mchsi.com

sylvia murphy mom of Carson 15 months old now

Sylvia,

Of course you are more than welcome to use the basket idea! I LOVE that you like it so well...and are going to use it to make a difference in someone else's life. How WONDERFUL that you are wanting to do this!

I contacted my local MOD chapter...I held a fundraiser at my children's birthday party...and this school year I am going to contact schools to see if we can raise money for this as a service project.

Also, Donna has come up with some great sites with cheap stuff you can buy in bulk. I would suggest checking that out!

Hugs,

Melissa

Melissa,

I know the baskets you've done will be so great for the families that receive them. Not only are the items helpful but just knowing someone else has been there and cares goes a really long way.

I don't know that this could go in a basket but something people might consider purchasing for their local NICU to have on hand is plaster molds. Our NICU gave us a mold of Jacob's feet and it is one of my most prized possessions. The Lord now holds Jacob in His arms but I still have this precious reminder of him that I can hold and caress to remember him. I think it's a kit that they got a company to donate. It's just precious.

Susan

Melissa,
Thank you for letting me use your idea. I am going to talk to a couple of teachers i know and see if i can get them to do some fund raisers.

One question where did you get the baskets.

Sylvia

Sylvia,

Thank YOU for using this idea!

Baskets really did not work out....so I should call them gift boxes. I bought white cardboard gift boxes...and cheap paper (I got several rolls for a dollar each....more somber for the grief baskets...more peppy for the welcome baskets). I used the paper to wrap the box lids...not the whole package....to where the lid could still fit on easily.

Good Luck! Please let me know about the progress of your baskets...and any of the great ideas you come up with along the way! I am eager to hear all about it!

Happy Gift Packing!

Melissa